raindrops in puddles
by Aiko Isari
Summary: "My brother has grown old," Luna thinks in Ariana's solemn voice. "But he's still unhappy. Why isn't he dreaming good dreams anymore?"From the end of one war to the end of another, Ariana watches over her brother's work. Reincarnation, a series of interconnected drabbles. Rating possible to change, semi-canon compliant
1. i

_**A/N:** _Hello there, this was a random thought that was going to be a oneshot but I decided: nah, this is fun. Please enjoy and let me know what you think!

* * *

raindrops in puddles

She often recalls wonderful lights.

She thinks of flowers and many voices and good, beautiful things like magic.

She remembers her heart becoming broken glass.

Luna remembers these things and remembers too much brightness and a lot of screams and sometimes some chills.

They are her memories. They are not her memories.

Even little, she knows that if she is a grave, she must remember anyway.


	2. ii

_**A/N:** _This will probably be daily updates until I catch up with what I've written. Enjoy and let me know what you think!

* * *

No sentences.

Yes, an important fact. She was the _baby _then so even when she got to be bigger than a bread loaf she was always the baby and not allowed to be around anymore.

Babies didn't speak in full sentences.

Luna knows Ariana used to think in those sentences. When she was well of course. When all she had to focus on was goats and squiggly letters and not speaking right because speaking was _painful _then, you see. Ariana knew that, so she had never tried to do it.

Being smart or dumb or like everybody else, those are things that Luna knows about, not Ariana.

But she _is _Ariana, so she can also not worry about those things. They don't matter, not like angels and Snorkacks and the _flowers-that-bloom-without-stems._

The flowers are always red.

And Luna always speaks clearly.

It doesn't mean she is always understood.


	3. iii

They dream of Hogwarts, dreaming of it together because even when the magic hurts _(because her magic was bad and it hurts and it hurts and they hurt and it mustn't do that, no it's supposed to be _gentle_) _she knows it's supposed to be beautiful and so does Ariana.

So they dream of it together, dancing it at their palms and telling stories with it, watching until papa gently uncups their hands _(This papa comes back every time, even when it's Ariana talking instead of Luna because Ariana is still afraid of using more than a few words and screams and her hands) _and tells her that to do that magic too much will attract the wrong people's eyes and then how will they be able to go nargle hunting together?

They understand. The wrong people watching happened once.

Ariana remembers it all of the time.

Luna does great care not to forget what that means. There are wrong people in the world, as there should be. But there are also right people.

Mama and Papa are right people.

Ariana thinks that her family was right too, but they did wrong things sometimes, but they were family.

She thinks they sometimes forgot that, as well.


	4. iv

Magic is pretty, magic is sad.

There are pretty lights so people are distracted by them.

She meets other people who do things like she does, with magic and lights and fairy tales. Luna loves fairy tales because, seeing as she does, all of them are true. Every fairy tale that isn't written down is true, because Papa says so. And because Mama has proved it.

And because monsters are real.

Monsters are boys who don't understand things and try to make those very same things fit into their worlds, are men who are supposed to be fathers who do bad things in the name of love, mothers and brothers who love but put up a cage made of tall white picket and fragile bricks.

Monsters are little girls who become broken teacups and can't be poured into anymore.

Monsters are magical and scary and brilliant.

If they are real, why aren't fairies? Why aren't fairy stories real?

If she can see things in rippling puddles, why does no one consider them real?

Because they do not want to.


	5. v

Magic doesn't hurt now.

Perhaps she has less of it.

They think they have more because it's always bubbling like Mama's potions and the bad inkwells, it just never hurts and it listens when they say _no_.

It's nice to have someone that listens, even if it's just yourself.


	6. vi

_**A/N:**_Thank you to my reviewer! Enjoy and let me know what you think.

* * *

Magic likes explosions.

Most of her magic isn't fireworks. Their magic tends to like flowers and toys and making things change and dance. It is with the goats Aberforth used to have and the nargles and puppy that Luna had until _the very big boom _happened.

Luna remembers it, not with fondness but with a distant bad sadness, like Ariana remembers her Mummy being gone.

It almost brings fits of rage and pain when she remembers. Almost.

But all Luna has is her Papa now, so she can't risk it. She can't risk being sad about things because if she does something like Mama did, and explodes, her poor Papa would not survive being alone.

They both suspect he won't survive her magic either, but no good comes of saying that.


	7. vii

When _that day _comes, Luna makes sure to remember. She recalls the potions that were being made when the tall man in the dark robes asks her, the exact amount dribbled in, the way the fire roared and her mother smiled at her.

_("Mama was happiest with me or with a big fire to play with. If we were both in the same room, she was like me, a happy little girl.")_

Luna, at nine, tells the tall men in clear, full sentences the color of the spells cast, and what she thinks the Latin was, and the colors of the odd potions in each flask before everything went horribly wrong, and Ariana quietly wonders who she is crying for: this Mummy her brothers said she had killed, or Luna's Mama, because they aren't the same person.

One was strict and stern but loved with a sad, rainy heart.

One is -_was_- free and cheery and always bouncing with love, a spitfire of warmth.

They guess they are not meant to have someone to grow up calling "mum".

Ariana had hers longer but Luna isn't jealous.

They're all the same, causing pain and destruction wherever they go.

It's rather sad, actually,

But life is supposed to be a bit sad, Ariana thinks, because if it wasn't, her mums wouldn't have tried so hard to make her happy.


	8. viii

When they are ten, one for a second time, they learn of a monster from a fairy tale. A monster who killed many people because they were different, like what those boys could have been, if they weren't dead.

Luna thinks the name Voldemort is silly. Ariana doesn't even know how to say it. They both decide it is a disease, like hating people. So he made his own disease because he hated people, and then killed people with it. How silly of him because now he is dead too.

Or people say he is dead, because of someone who was a baby once and now is a kid now, just like her. And because of Albus.

Luna finds it fun to call him headmaster, even though Ariana chants the name "Al" like raindrops on a summer day because she is so happy he is here too, alive too.

She is happy to be able to go to his school and use magic.

She thinks their brothers would like that if they knew who she was, even if she has no friends.

Luna would rather like friends, but people have trouble with strangeness. They are a strange person, but that's all right. They have Dad, and this one isn't going away.

Still, they both agree, friends are something they don't know about, but would really like very much.


	9. ix

_**A/N:** _Soon there will be Hogwarts. Please let me know what you think!

* * *

Diagon Alley makes Ariana nervous.

It is the most people she has ever been around, so Luna understands. But if you smile enough, anyone will like you. Or if they don't like you, they won't know what to do with you instead, and that will make them quiet and curious and scared, like kitties without mommies. Or lonely puppies.

It's too bad she can't bring a puppy to Hogwarts. People considered them too dirty and not... magicky enough.

Magic doesn't mean a thing if the animal loves you, and everyone knows toads love freedom more than people, much like cats love using people and owls are just... owls.

So no pets. That's fine. There will plenty of opportunities to hunt for Blibbering Humdingers and nargles and Snorkacks. There's no where that says that they can't _find _those.

Not that this makes Ariana any less nervous, but Luna knows how to make her magic not jump out by now. No means no most of the time, after all.

Dad probably doesn't even realize that Luna is the one actually looking at books and supplies. He hasn't noticed much since Mum went and did what she did and when he has, she's been sure it's been what Ariana says instead of what Luna does because helping Ariana makes him feel better.

That's what they think anyways.


	10. x

She wonders if her dad will be okay while she is at Hogwarts.

They certainly will be. Albus will be there. And maybe they can find Abe too.

Maybe they just need to get Luna's dad an Albus of his very own.

But not another Mum. There can't _be _another Mum.

Someone nice is good though.


	11. xi

Ginny is nice.

She gets awfully skittish when some people walk past their compartment, but Luna thinks little of it. Her father's Quibbler issue is more interesting and she thinks Ginny doesn't wish to draw attention to that but it's obvious. She thinks Ginny doesn't know how not to be obvious.

Ariana feels that Ginny will be their friend someday.

But neither of them know what a friend is, so how could they have one?

When they reach the castle, there is a rather large man guiding them up to the entrance. It's all very melodramatic, whispers a girl and a boy scoffs and tells her to shut up.

So very rude. Being honest does not mean to be rude. Perhaps the boy is simply close-minded. Boys seem to be like that, except for timid boys who know what being laughed at is like. She saw one of those on the train too, who kept chasing a toad down the compartments and looking shy whenever it managed to squeeze through a doorway.


	12. xii

Luna smells blood on the walls before everyone else sees the cat, and a part of her thinks it serves the cat right. It always hisses about evil children and disgusting humans and how its Argus will make them dance on the ceiling one day and its words scare Ariana to tears day in and day out and it hurts her ears to hear the girl cry so seeing the cat so rightly terrified and frozen is not a bother. It will be able to be fixed anyway.

What bothers her is that the cat was Petrified and no one knows how. Not even she knows how. She writes to her father, and her father owls with nothing useful and it saddens her. Because one cat is one life and there will be more. More blood, more people, more whispers.

She sees Ginny across the hall, and her face is befuddled and hurt and clingy, clingy to something in her bag.

Perhaps they ought to say something.

_But nobody has open ears in this place._

Ariana is right to think that.


	13. xiii

There are children popping up Petrified everywhere she looks.

Muggles, she thinks. Muggle-borns. Why is it always them?

_Dirty blood,_ her father would remind her if she was here. Both of their fathers. Albus too. Well, he once would have. Watching him run around now, she doesn't think so. _People think only fully magical blood is worth anything and they're desperate to keep it. They are behind the times, and they will be the ones to regret it someday._

Ariana thinks of her father attacking Muggle boys that put mud on her dress and blood in her hair and told her magic to make things explode.

Luna thinks of her father growing plants that no Muggle would understand without explanations and a Memory Charm.

Both of them wonder who is really behind the times and who is just simply very scared.


	14. xiv

_**A/N:**_ I love you, all of my fans.

* * *

Ginny is missing.

It's not the bad missing, not yet, but she has skipped class again and her dormmates whisper about fever and vomiting and closed curtains. Of course, when she asks, they only sneer at her and laugh, something about the boyish cut of her hair and the way her eyes look. Or is it because of the protective charm of a used bubble wand sticking out of her back pocket?

Why do people think about such strange things?

She only writes to her father again, and doesn't say anything.

She is very relieved when Ginny finally returns to the Great Hall and to her many brothers, who close around her like there is no change. But Luna couldn't grasp why and, upon further exploration, nor can Ariana.

Ginny is not her friend.

But no one else seems to see the dark circles, the small limp, the hunch of her shoulders.

She waits for her father's letter to come.


End file.
